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I saw this CS Lewis quote today. It was me:

"all this is flashy rhetoric about loving you.
i never had a selfless thought since i was born.
i am mercenary and self-seeking through and through;
i want god, you, all friends, merely to serve my turn.

peace, reassurance, pleasure, are the goals i seek.
i cannot crawl one inch outside my proper skin;
i talk of love - a scholar's parrot may talk greek
-but, self-imprisoned, always end where i begin."

Ouch