A recent acquaintance invited me over for lunch today. Yoko-san picked me up at 11 am and we walked to her apartment. The meal was great and we had a good time. Yoko lived in America for a year so her English is good. I had a wonderful time and believe that a good foundation for a friendship was formed.
After two hours I was ready to go home. It was 1:30 pm when I began to feel antsy. I had a strong sense that lunch should be over and I must to go "do things". Only the normal cues of closure never came, she actually brought out more green tea. So there was more food and talking. I relaxed and enjoyed Yoko’s company. The strong restless feeling returned at 3 pm yet again there was no ending. Again she brought out more green tea. It was not till after meeting her children, playing a weird non-violent video game, two more cups of tea the lunch was over…I arrived back at my place at 5 pm.
As I walked into my room a small voice asked, "was it a productive day"? The task-driven "to do list" part of me replied "No". I could only check off one item, how could that be considered productive? Reality reminds me that I was with a real person, listening, learning, being a part of her world, and forming a friendship. It was a successful day! People matter more than my to do list.