Reflections on Chapter Two of the Sacred Rhythms: Solitude

I've read a few spiritual discipleship books in my time. I took a class in college focused solely on spiritual transformation. With so much instruction sometimes I get the mistaken idea and confidence that I know about spiritual matters and I'm done learning. So, when I started chapter two I was surprised. I was surprised that Barton decided to begin with solitude. It didn't seem like the correct starting place. I was expecting prayer, praise, maybe scripture reading, or anything else; not solitude. Solitude had always felt like a tag on, an additional practice, or a task for monks; it was not the beginning. I was wrong.

Solitude is the place we encounter God, in the still and quiet. Solitude can be a specific location we've set aside for this specific alone time but at it's core it is about withdrawing from the business of the day to be with God. I think of Jesus seeking God alone in the deserted places. Or even Elijah's time with God in the desert after his encounter with the prophets of Baal on the mountain top. He is scared and exhausted and in the stillness meets with God.

"...solitude is a place inside myself where God's Spirit and my spirit dwell together in union. This place within me is private and reserved for the intimacies that God and I share." Sacred Rhythms, Solitude, p. 32

Barton was very intentional in her choice to make solitude the first chapter. It was a decision made from experience and spiritual insight. In the middle of the chapter she explains her reasoning. It comes after a section in which she has been open and vulnerable about a time when she was soul tired, worn from doing, and in desperate need of rest.

"Most of us are more tired than we know at the soul level. We are teetering on the brink of dangerous exhaustion, and we really cannot do anything else until we have gotten some rest. The other disciplines described in this book and elsewhere are a wonderful smorgasbord of spiritual sustenance, but we really can't engage any of them until solitude becomes a place of rest for us rather than another place for human striving and hard work." Sacred Rhythms, Solitude, p. 37

She's right, we end up focused on the striving and works and forget to be. A phrase I've heard from number of pastors is "we are human beings not human doings." We get caught up doing for God and forget to be with God. I think that's why there are so many Scriptural reminders to be still before God. I know I struggle at times not to think of spiritual practices as tasks to either get through or earn me God's favour. Barton recognizes that even good practices can become focused on earning and works. As she says, spiritual activities can become "another place for human striving..." Solitude is a choice to stop doing and just be without fixing. It can be hard to recognize our need to rest and harder still to sit still but why is it challenging?

"There is nothing in Western culture or even in our religious subculture to support us in entering into these times for "unproductive" being rather than frenetic doing." Sacred Rhythms, Solitude, p. 34

Seeking solitude is counter to our culture, even our spiritual subculture. We want to be doing and produce, and sitting still is in opposition to this ingrained trait. This can be seen in our daily habits and tasks, from the to do lists to work expectations. At many jobs taking a break is seen as lazy, not healthy. Even how we vacation and "recharge" is often active. We go on vacation, which is filled with activities, sight seeing, projects, and more doing. More then once I've returned from a holiday thinking I need a rest and time to recover from the break I just took. We don't know how the be still. As Barton says, "We're busy trying to make stuff happen rather than waiting on God to make stuff happen." This is another reason I was surprised that solitude was the first chapter, the act of that sitting in stillness is uncomfortable and not our natural default:

"Most of us are not very good at sitting with longing and desire -our own or someone else's.  It feels tender. It feel vulnerable. It feels out of control. It is a place where one human being cannot fix or fill another, nor can we fix or fill ourselves. It is a place where only God will do." Sacred Rhythms, Solitude, p. 31

We have to learn how to come away with Jesus. It needs to be demonstrated, practiced and encouraged. And the struggle to find solitude has only grown as our world has become saturated with technology. Smart phones, laptops, and WiFi promise the world at our fingertips and a connection to others unprecedented in history. It also has made us always on call with no downtime. How often do you see families out with everyone on their phones? How often do you find yourself tempted to check your messages, Facebook, other social media accounts, or whatever ping your phone just made? Even those who avoid smart phones (my mother is a great example). There is still the computer with email and now zoom and other video chat services. It is all draining.

"No wonder we feel disconnect from God: we are rarely able to give him our full attention in solitude and silence." Sacred Rhythms, Solitude, p. 35

"Constant noise, interruption and drivenness to be more productive cut us off from or at least interrupt the direct experience of God and other human beings, and this is more isolating than we realize. Because we are experiencing less meaningful human and divine connection, we are emptier relationally, and we try harder and harder to fill that loneliness with even more noise and stimulation. In so doing we lose touch with the quieter and more subtle experiences of God within...

Solitude is an opportunity to interrupt this cycle..." Sacred Rhythms, Solitude, p. 36

If you are interested in interrupting the cycle, if you are weary from the doing and worn from religious activities, or if you crave soul rest, then Jesus' invitation to his followers in Mark 6:30, to 'come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest awhile.'" is for you too.

The Practical:
Similar to the first practical experience, we being the actual time of solitude in a comfortable position. Consider the place you will be using. Do you feel safe? Can you remove distractions? Will this spot allow you to be open and available to God? This could be a favourite chair in your home, a spot in an office or guest room, somewhere in your backyard, under a tree.

Before you begin, an optional "pre-step" you can do is a "brain dump". It is a tool I picked up about six years ago at a leadership conference and has helped my ADHD brain prepare for new learning, creative planning, and even times of silence and solitude. You will need a blank sheet paper, it can be in a notebook but could also be a scrap page from the recycling box. Give yourself a few minutes, try setting a timer for five minutes. In that limited time write everything on your mind. This looks different from person to person or even day-to-day. Sometimes I have a number of lists; other times it is a jumble of brainstorming. The method of writing is not what is important but rather the saving of what is on your mind. You are removing distractions and enabling your whole self to focus on this time with God.

As you settle into your comfortable position sit still for a few moments. Take time to breath deeply and calm down. In this stillness invite God into this time. Give yourself a moment to realize God is present and wants to be with you.

In this stillness wait. Let yourself pause and be. I find it takes practice to stay still. My mind keeps wanting to get up and do. Acknowledge this, and then remind yourself that the purpose of this time is to be. In this pause, evaluate, how is my soul? Questions Barton suggests are:

• Is there a particular joy you are celebrating?
• A loss you are grieving?
• Are there tears waiting to be shed?
• A question that is stirring?
• An emotion that needs expression?

Other questions could be: is there a topic you've been avoiding, a hurt that needs healing, a sin that needs confessing? Or, with recent events and the state of the world is there thoughts you need to work through, feelings that are overwhelming, justice that needs addressing?

This next part is the hardest, when you have a feeling or a thought come up, do not try to fix or solve it. Sit with the feeling. Sit and be present with it and with God. 

"Sit with what comes into your awareness, becoming conscious of God's presence with you in that awareness. Don't try to do anything with what you're knowing except be with it...Feel the difference between trying to fix it and just being with it. Feel the difference between doing something with it and resting with it. Feel the difference between trying to fight it and letting God fight for you. What does it mean for you to be still and let God fight (or work) for you in this particular area?" Sacred Rhythms, Solitude, p. 44

This will take practice. At first it will be strange. It will take time to get use to being still and not jumping to fix a thought. It will not always be easy but it will be worth it.